Hayley is a Ghost

In which she moans about cheese and egg

Posted on: August 26, 2010

As somebody who has worked in the retail industry since the age of fifteen I have always prided myself on being the ideal sort of customer. Someone who doesn’t bitch, moan, feel the need to be arrogant, condesending, awkward, aggressive or mean.

I’m not overly fussy, I’m always willing to try an alternative and I always say “hello”, “please”, “thank you” and “that’s fine, I can wait”.

However, since starting a vegetarian diet at the beginning of this year there is one thing that has slowly started to bug me. Every time I go out shopping it bugs me, it eats away at the calm patience that I try to keep while shopping and I can take it no more. I need to vent.

Not all vegetarians like cheese or egg. Okay?

Is that really hard to get? I’m a vegetarian and I don’t want a damn cheese or egg sandwich.

It’s not cool to simply offer cheese or egg sandwiches as vegetarian options. Quite frankly, it’s a shit thing to do considering 99% of the time I ask the person in the shop selling sandwiches if the eggs are free range or if the cheese is veggie friendly THEY DON’T KNOW!

How, in the name of all that is quite nice, can you class two types of sandwich as vegetarian friendly IF YOU’RE NOT SURE THEY ACTUALLY ARE?!

Cheese. Cheese & onion. Cheese Ploughmans. Cheese and Pickle. Four cheese. Egg. Egg and Mayo. Egg and lettuce. Aaaaarrrggghhh!!!!

What if I’m a vegetarian who doesn’t like egg or cheese? Would a meat eater have this problem? No! They have beef, ham, turkey, and chicken sandwiches galore!

Seriously, next time you are at a sandwich shop or a shop chiller cabinet just feast your eyes on the amount of dead and cut up chicken there is. It’s, it’s CRAZY!

What the giddy fuck is wrong with someone, somewhere, in a sandwich making environment (I’m looking at you Greggs….) coming up with a sandwich or panini that has no meat or animal ingredient that differs from cheese or egg?

And NO! Taking the ham out of that ham salad sandwich WILL NOT SUFFICE YOU BARBARIAN!

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12 Responses to "In which she moans about cheese and egg"

Surely looking for vegan sarnies would be a better approach.

Also: “panini” is plural, the singular form which you seek is “panino”

I work in Trowbridge and I have never seen one shop here that stocks vegan sandwiches.

suggesting that there might be vegan when you can’t find veggie is unfortunately akin to looking for coke when you can’t find water. iv been vegetarian for 17 yrs (since i was 11) and i still hate having to accept that the ‘vegetarian’ cheese/egg sandwich probably is not (and that is as a big fan of cheese and eggs). and sometimes it just means going hungry

Maybe the cheese was free range?

but it would still have had rennet in it. From a calves stomach. Bleurgh.

Check out how many sandwiches come with tomato. I loathe tomato. Anyways.

What sort of “veggie” sandwiches would you suggest, for off the shelf selection. Keep in mind, they have to mass produced, sit on a shelf for extended periods of time etc etc.

“Mock meat” is usually quite cheap and easily produced and has a longer life that real meat.

i meant I was more thinking ones that could be made that would sit happily on a shelf for a day or two. I believe certain veg, those with a high water content tend to go limp and make the bread soggy. if you see what I mean. As I am not a veggie I can’t think of a sandwich which would be suitable

I can relate. I was once a scorned vegetarian, myself.

Try finding a vegetarian sandwich in Scotland. The closest thing is a deepfried Mars bar between two slices of fried bread.

I’m not veggie but my gripe is that I don’t like mayonnaise, and yet it’s on EVERY sandwich on offer. If it isn’t mayo, it’s some other similar gloop. Why can’t I have a plain sandwich with no dressing???

I believe the mayo acts as a carries to stop the bread going all soggy, but I could be wrong, plus it stops the sandwich from being to dry.

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Hayley is a ghost

Hayley Stevens is an advocate for science-based research into seemingly paranormal experiences and occurrences. With a background in the pseudo-scientific research into ghosts, Hayley offers a unique insight into the strange world of ghost hunting through her experience.

She describes herself as 'a ghost hunter who doesn't hunt for ghosts' and this is her personal blog where she writes about ghosts, people, and other interesting things. Read more here.

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